I have around 3,500 downloaded songs

PS: I work for the RIAA

I have a facebook account since 2007 and I still don't get how it works. I think i'll never understand it. I always get lost or don't know where to find certain things and have to ask my younger brother.

I went to my boyfriend's house today to meet his family. When I met her sister, she asked me 'you are the one who slept here last week right? You should have stayed for breakfast'. I never slept there. I'm feeling horrible.

I think one of my friends is falling in love with me. A male friend. He lives far away, but it's weird, every time he signs in to aol he talks to me seconds after it. He wants to talk to me every day, and when i don't answer him he starts saying 'why don't you answer me?' 'what's wrong with you?'. He wasn't like that before, and no friends are like that, there is nothing wrong with no talking one day! Plus many times he told me that he might be gay, or at least bisexual! I'm like 80% sure he likes me.

My girlfriend's sister is really hot. She is only 16 but almost as tall as me. I get so horny when she's around, I would give anything to fuck her at least once! I know she is too young but you have to see this girl!

I'm scared of starting to take the pill, I feel like if I do, I'm just gonna go around wanting to fuck everybody

I went to San Diego with my girlfriend to meet and visit her parents for the weekend. In those two days I flirted with their youngest daughter, killed their cat, and took a crap in their swimming pool...The worst part is, her parents don't know this and now they think I'm an angel!!